This is how my day has gone so far...
"Don't pick up the baby!"
"Stop poking his eyes."
"Stop playing in the toilet!"
"Don't sit on the baby!"
"Stop pushing the swing! The baby does NOT want to go faster."
"Who threw all the fridge magnets all over the kitchen floor?!?"
"Don't wipe your nose on the baby's blanket, please."
"Stop touching his face."
"Stay out of the baby's bassinet."
"Don't climb on Mommy when she's holding the baby. Actually, just don't climb on Mommy at all right now."
"Give me back the baby's bottle...wait...no, don't put it in your mouth!"
"Leave the baby alone for 2 minutes, please!"
"Yes, Mommy's tummy is still big. No, there are no more babies in it."
"Put that dishsoap back under the sink NOW."
And my personal favorite...
"Yes, we are ALL taking naps after lunch today."